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This is Us

The holidays are coming. Tortured by thoughts of place settings, pumpkin mousse, and home-made cranberry sauce, I lie awake night after night.  Insomnia traditionally starts this week and lasts until January 2.  I will sleep soundly the night of the 2nd.

But until then, I revisit holidays past, obsess about holidays present, and try to come up with a plan to avoid holidays future.  A friend goes to Paris every year for Thanksgiving but until I retire from my perpetual unemployment, I will have to stay home.

Thanksgiving 2016.  I am late.  I am driving to my newly married sister's home.  My cell phone rings.

"What are you wearing?" my sister-in-law asks.

"What? Why?" I say.

"It might get ruined."


"There was a fire. But don't worry, your husband put it out with a fire extinguisher.  The turkey looks okay."

"Wait, Doug's there?" I asked.

He runs a road race on Thanksgiving every year. Some years he doesn't…

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